same sex adoption

[JOHNNYAITCH]

The fact remains that no matter what environment children are looked after (including their family home) it leaves some of them open to a wide range of extremely damaging issues and impacts detrimentally where that family home is not as it should be

 

 

***t happens..we all know that

[Aussie Rules]

I've even heard of 'straight' parents leaving their children unattended in hotel rooms in foreign climes...

 

Abuse and neglect of children can be found just about everywhere.

[mr.hobblesworth]

The fact remains that no matter what environment children are looked after (including their family home) it leaves some of them open to a wide range of extremely damaging issues and impacts detrimentally where that family home is not as it should be

 

 

***t happens..we all know that

 

Yes, agreed, but you're talking about extreme examples of the vast vast minority of children that live with their families compared to a system that is fundamentally flawed. I know that it's all we have at present (and all that we are ever likely to have) and it serves it's purpose at times but to describe an environment as a "great place to live" is quite crass, IMHO.

 

Anyway, this is off topic.

[JOHNNYAITCH]

Yes, agreed, but you're talking about extreme examples of the vast vast minority of children that live with their families compared to a system that is fundamentally flawed. I know that it's all we have at present (and all that we are ever likely to have) and it serves it's purpose at times but to describe an environment as a "great place to live" is quite crass, IMHO.

 

Maybe he was just posting about where he works?

[geosname]

I can remember a time when kids were left on pub doorsteps by their parents..... or sat in a corner when the father crawled home from the pub to batter his wife

[Aussie Rules]

Yes, agreed, but you're talking about extreme examples of the vast vast minority of children that live with their families compared to a system that is fundamentally flawed. I know that it's all we have at present (and all that we are ever likely to have) and it serves it's purpose at times but to describe an environment as a "great place to live" is quite crass, IMHO.

 

Anyway, this is off topic.

 

Perhaps, but the debate draws its genesis from the emotive word 'abuse'.

 

After 38 years working with youth in crisis I think I can safely say I've seen nearly all shades of child abuse.

 

Some of the homes I've visited were nothing short of derelict, but the kids were loved and they loved their kinfolk. Other homes were well furnished with the kids wanting for nothing - except love.

 

As I say, child abuse crosses social boundaries.

[mr.hobblesworth]

Maybe he was just posting about where he works?

 

What d'you mean? That it's a house/ locality that he'd like to live in? Are you not being a little facetious?!

[bookworm]

I can remember a time when kids were left on pub doorsteps by their parents..... or sat in a corner when the father crawled home from the pub to batter his wife

 

so can i but unfortunately it still happens.

[Aussie Rules]

Maybe he was just posting about where he works?

 

Correct JA :)

[Andyregs]

Andy 90% of single parent have no option ie death separation violence most I know try their best but married couple is the best option

 

But that wasn't the point I was getting at. You seem to be making a moral judgement about homosexuality as opposed to what is the best environment for the kid then, otherwise both would be 'unnatural' (though not a term id use for any of the situations in any way) regardless of the reason. Or is it ok if the gay couple are married?

[JOHNNYAITCH]

What d'you mean? That it's a house/ locality that he'd like to live in? Are you not being a little facetious?!

 

No..maybe he was just posting about the quality of care where he works as being a good place for children who need a care home of some sort compared to other care homes

[JOHNNYAITCH]

What's happened to Andyregs post about me? I was looking forward to responding

 

Anyway I suggest that he calms down..seems to get very...het up by things on here

 

I haven;t lied in anyway Andy..in the thread referred to by me you brought abuse by catholic priests into the debate which until then had focussed on the Muslim group who had abused girls, My point was and is that there was nothing to inicate that the priests did what they did becasue they are catholic/religious so it's not right to draw a parallel or claim it as a religious atrocity in anyway...we have no idea whether being religious made them paedophiles and they may have been so irrespective of their nreligion/job

 

But in the case of these particular Muslims they felt it Ok to do what they did becasue of their warped version of Islam and its attitude to young white girls

 

No lies of any sort..I don't lie

[Birdy]

childrens homes are a substitute for homes for children, its not the ideal solution but better than some I have seen. The system, like any other, is open to abuse. the consequences of that abuse are usually devastating.

The last childrens home I visited here contained hundreds of little souls of all ages from new borns to teenagers, my initial visit was to ask what they needed most [baby milk and nappies] and to see what else I could supply, a quick trip around tesco filling baskets with essentials and several baskets with none essentials [plastic toys, crayons and pencils, colouring books, etc] a barter with the manager for a discount [which was spent filling more baskets] I hired a van and delivered the goods.... what I did not know was that the kids who benefit are gathered around and sing you a song in thanks... it was too much for me so my wife had to sit through it while I hid away and cried [just like now at the memory]. Out of the cities its different the poorest families send their children to the temple and the monks take care of them or to relatives or even none relatives if its a new mouth to feed.

 

It didnt make me feel better giving a few hundred pounds... seeing 4 kids faces light up when I gave them a few cheap toys to replace the broken one wheeled car they were sharing gave me an incredible high followed by a crushing low... I dont go personally any more but I still have things delivered

A moving story mate and a reminder that loving parents/guardians/carers are essential to youngsters development whether it is one parent, two parents, straight or gay. We don't know how lucky were are sometimes.

 

My wife works for a inner London borough for children's services and I selfishly cannot listen to her caseload sometimes, it's heartbreaking. Begrudging children of loving parents irrelevant of their circumstances is completely destructive and illogical.

[JOHNNYAITCH]

I can remember a time when kids were left on pub doorsteps by their parents..... or sat in a corner when the father crawled home from the pub to batter his wife

 

On many occasions when my Mum and Dad went to the Sperling in Norton I was left outside with some pop and crisps to play on the steps and railings. Never felt this was neglect/abuse and I still don't, and afterwards we all went to the chippy for a mixture. However my Dad never drank excessively (can't remember ever seeing him drunk) and my Mum could manage no more than a sherry.

 

Must be horrible to have drunken parents

[mr.hobblesworth]

No..maybe he was just posting about the quality of care where he works as being a good place for children who need a care home of some sort compared to other care homes

 

No children's home is a "great place to grow up", just as no institutuion is a great place to grow up, regardless of the quality of care offered. Stop making excuses/ interpreting for him!