I'm Sooooo Sorry…

I'm Sooooo Sorry…

Dateline 2nd March, 2004 Loftus Road – somewhere down south.

Finally we have our culprit. No, it’s not Tin Man, not the players, not the ref, not the respective ‘Club officials, not anybody else except CapnPimp. It’s his fault entirely, and his rotten cigarettes, that we lost to QPR tonight.

***

I’m Sooooo Sorry…

I feel I must apologise
For it’s really down to me
The reason why we scored just two
Whilst ‘Rangers made it three.

You see, I have this ritual
When the ‘Lads on a role
To take a little ‘time-out’
By going for a stroll.

The ritual’s nothing special mind,
It isn’t even big,
And it’s even got a name
Simply called ‘my lucky cig’.

Now my funny little habit
Has served us well to date
Turning likely draws and losses
Into better things and great.

With thirty minutes on the clock
I thought the time was right
To perform my little routine
So I wandered out of sight.

It was very dark and cold outside
As I sharply puffed away
Whilst thinking of the three points
We’d be taking home today.

And whilst my health may suffer
Sometime later in my life,
To me it seemed quite trivial
Down at Loftus Road tonight.

Feeling better for my ‘time-out’,
But nervous just the same,
I joined my Valiant family
For the last part of the game.

When returning to the terraces
I was stunned and quite surprised
And my mouth just dropped a mile
When seeing they’d equalised.

I was feeling quite despondent
That my lucky little charm
Had finally betrayed me
Delivering nought and harm.

So I’ve made myself a promise
That I’ll not again rely
On those smelly sticks from hell
Until the day I die.

Yes, it’s a habit hard to break
As you will all agree?
But I’ll do my very best at least
‘till Blackpool by the sea.

Again, I must apologise
For it’s really down to me
The reason why we scored just two
Whilst ‘Rangers made it three.

Barry Edge
Western Australia
March 2, 2004

🙂

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