Derby Day in Stoke-on-Trent

Exiled Valiant Barry Edge lives in Perth, Western Australia. Barry, like the rest of us, enjoys Derby Days – especially when we beat Stoke City.

Derby Day in Stoke-on-Trent

The banter on Fielding’s message board
Is candid and robust
With wit and humour, sour grapes too,
Plus other not so just,
Do I have my favorites?
The answer is I do,
Almost every true blue Valiant
Plus several Stokies too.

Our BurslemVale worries
And doesn’t want the hassle
Of meeting up with riot police
At the ‘Good Britannia Castle’,
The place of Louiels The King
And others of that kith,
Who wait for us in Hanford
To give us verbal stick.

Why couldn’t it be on Saturday?
Our BurslemVale asks,
Sunday is for other things
Such as all those household tasks,
But then again, to win away,
Especially you know where
Is worth the pain and suffering
So he’s going to be there.

Now MCF has his own idea,
As novel ideas go,
With a cheeky wink says ‘Let Stoke win’
And trouble you’ll not know,
But VofS is equal to the task
In rejecting such a thought,
That we should simply let Them win
Will surely come to nought.

Still others, like TallPaul,
Have got it all worked out,
He’ll park his car and walk the mile
To the green bridge by the moat,
And along the way he’ll say G’day
To Mrs Matthews’ boy,
His bonhomie with the red and whites
Is certainly no ploy.

Just ‘hang about’ says Valex
Where can I get those pills?
Will they do the job on me
Without side effects or ills?
No! No! He’s not on tablets
Please don’t waste your money,
There are magic mushrooms in the wild
Guaranteed to send you funny.

How many are you bringing?
Who do you think will score?
What will your team formation be?
You’ve heard them all before,
It doesn’t matter who we play
The questions are the same,
So away with all this banter
It’s time to watch the game.

But is it just a Derby Day?
Will it be another draw?
Or is there more importance
Than just the final score?
Yes, it’s bigger than the LDV
This game between two Towns,
It’s who will win the Bragging Rights,
Who will wear the Crown.

Barry Edge
Western Australia
January, 2002


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