When Barry read the Cardiff Rivals message board he said he could have been knocked over with a feather. So he had a closer sticky-beak (look) to see what all the flapping was about.
Our Intrepid Leader seems to have alienated at least two of our Welsh friends with his preview of the Cardiff game. One, known as Armchair Blue, had his say and flew away immediately. The other, known as Ronaldinho, got into a right flutter.
Well, I just couldn’t let this one pass. Sure, it’s a fun poem. But it is also an olive branch to Ronaldinho – whom I will call Bluebird Two. And should you read this Mister ‘dinho, please accept it in good faith.
Bluebird One, Bluebird Two
Did Fielding’s ‘Preview’ upset you?
And don’t you think it’s quite insane
To want to start a cyber flame?
Armchair Blue is Bluebird One
Who can’t work out what Rob has done
When writing of the game to be
With a splash of wit and irony.
Ronaldinho is Bluebird Two
Who has a different point of view
When saying Rob ‘is writing crap’
Before flying off across the track.
Mister ‘dinho will you please
Help to put our minds at ease?
For there’s nothing nasty that we can see
To make a bird fly off its tree.
Rob promised not to mention sheep
And the puns he used were tongue in cheek
But dear, oh dear, and my, oh my
They seemed to make your feathers fly.
That bit about your Sam Hamman,
Your ‘lovely’ boss of the Calon Lân,
And the quote that he may dye his ‘brows
Would not even scare the Crows.
Rob mentioned Thorne and t’other bloke
Who onetime used to play for Stoke,
But nothing written, said or did
Should make a bird fall from its twig.
It’s true there was an inference
Of Kavanagh’s play making others wince,
But if Bluebirds say he’s a super boot
Then should you give an Owl’s hoot?
In Fielding’s notes a moment was spent
On a Zambian born boy of Welsh descent
Who wears with pride the Dragon’s crest
As clear as the red on a Robin’s breast.
That point about his Zambian birth
Was Fielding’s subtle, gentle mirth,
But Rob did mention, to be fair,
Ernie’s maiden goal where Eagles dare.
Now Mister ‘dinho, may I say,
An invective style is not Rob’s way,
That your response was off the mark
To what was really just a Lark.
When saying sorry, you will note,
That our man Rob is a top shelf bloke
Whose humour’s always very light
For he’s not one to Wilson’s Snipe.
On top of which you’re out of order
To call us ‘nobs from across the border’,
Because if nothing’s done, and very soon,
We’ll be deeper than the deepest Loon.
I guess the point I’m trying to make
Is that we have no need for all this hate,
And next time try to be less stern
Or you’ll end up like a Noddy Tern.
Who is this bloke? I hear you ask,
That dares to put me to the task?
Well, I’m rarely seen, but often heard,
Just like the Australian Cooee bird.
Perth, Western Australia
January 24, 2003