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24 minutes ago, toyahw said:

At the end of day, none of this rubbish helps. If you are depressed you have to learn to deal with it. Advice from people who have no idea what it is like, never suffered from it, is meaningless. Any idea that some tape or a bit of "mindfullness" hocus pocus just makes things worse. 

Take one day at a time, and try to take pleasure in something every day. That is what my shrink tells me. Easier said than done. But you have to try.

Probably the worst possible advice anyone can give someone with mental health issues. ‘Deal with it’, ‘pull yourself together’. There are lots of things people can do to help. Talking therapy has proven success. And everyone is different. Just because something doesn’t come in a pill doesn’t mean it’s worthless. And I’m someone who doesn’t like ‘fluff’. 

 

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3 minutes ago, Andyregs said:

Probably the worst possible advice anyone can give someone with mental health issues. ‘Deal with it’, ‘pull yourself together’. There are lots of things people can do to help. Talking therapy has proven success. And everyone is different. Just because something doesn’t come in a pill doesn’t mean it’s worthless. And I’m someone who doesn’t like ‘fluff’. 

 

I already acknowledged that it was as an ill judged comment and that yes it is what works for you. My point really was just that there is no magic bullet. Personally I found the mindfulness  stuff a waste of time. If it works for others that is fine. 

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I was 15 when I was diagnosed.... it takes time to gain some control, it never goes away completely.

Pills didn't help at all, valium, librium, lithium and the rest just hid it away in the shadows. Counselling made me aware of control, specifically meditation/relaxation/self hypnosis showed me control was possible.

I still get mood swings, not as violent and unpredictable as before but they still come occassionaly ...... I used to enjoy the highs.

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4 hours ago, geosname said:

I was 15 when I was diagnosed.... it takes time to gain some control, it never goes away completely.

Pills didn't help at all, valium, librium, lithium and the rest just hid it away in the shadows. Counselling made me aware of control, specifically meditation/relaxation/self hypnosis showed me control was possible.

I still get mood swings, not as violent and unpredictable as before but they still come occassionaly ...... I used to enjoy the highs.

I remember when i first spoke up to a doctor and they straight away put me on tablets without any therapy or counselling. While a temporary fix it's didn't help me in the long term. 

I've gone the other way now and will be staring CBT soon hopefully to help me manage this crippling illness.

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33 minutes ago, boslemportvale91 said:

I remember when i first spoke up to a doctor and they straight away put me on tablets without any therapy or counselling. While a temporary fix it's didn't help me in the long term. 

I've gone the other way now and will be staring CBT soon hopefully to help me manage this crippling illness.

My mother was prescribed librium in her early 30s, repeat prescriptions went on for 30 years before someone tried to get her off them. After a couple of weeks at north staffs they managed to reduce the dosage and only 1 capsule a day but far to late, the reductions were proving to do more damage than good.

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55 minutes ago, boslemportvale91 said:

I remember when i first spoke up to a doctor and they straight away put me on tablets without any therapy or counselling. While a temporary fix it's didn't help me in the long term. 

I've gone the other way now and will be staring CBT soon hopefully to help me manage this crippling illness.

CBT is probably one of the talking therapies with the most evidence of success. I know someone close to me who has gone through it and found it really useful. I nearly posted as such earlier, so I hope it’s good for you. 
As for meds they can literally be a lifesaver for some, especially at crisis point, but I agree getting to the root of the issue will have better long term results. But again, here everyone is difference. Mental health can be an imbalance in brain chemistry and medication can help balance that out, just as medication for more physical ailments can maintain someone’s quality of life. 

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I never trust a doctor who's first instinctive reaction is to reach for the prescription pad (although it's probably all done on computer now).

I could write reams about what I did, how I did it and what happened along the way, however people are not the same and suffer differently. I would only advise people to find their own path in their own time.

However I will say it is not insurmountable. 

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There are definitely benefits from certain tablets. I've been on different types from sertraline ,propranolol and citalopram all had different effects. Beta Blockers turned me into a fatigue mess though I was needing an extra nap on them and had terrible headaches. Everyone reacts differently i imagine. 

I think another thing important is the lack of sunlight/Vitamin D.

Pitch black at 4pm is enough to make anyone feel tired and sad. I've never been great in the winter especially losing my father late October two years ago. Christmas is a write off for me 

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3 hours ago, boslemportvale91 said:

I remember when i first spoke up to a doctor and they straight away put me on tablets without any therapy or counselling. While a temporary fix it's didn't help me in the long term. 

I've gone the other way now and will be staring CBT soon hopefully to help me manage this crippling illness.

CBT takes some buying into, especially the mindfulness which Toyah has already touched on.  However, try to be open minded about it and take the bits you can relate to.  It helps you to understand what's happening and also gives you some tools to deal with it.

It does get better, I promise you.  How you are feeling will pass.

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After multiple visits to the hospital and multiple anxiety episodes. I'm now waiting to see someone for CBT and taking diazepam. However I am having the worst panic attacks ever. Even going for a stroll is an effort, I just feel dizzy and struggle to catch my breath. 

Using Google is more damaging then helping and none of the breathing programs seem to be helping. If anyone has any podcasts , books or routines that can help me I'd appreciate it. Absolutely exhausted at this point.

Mentally I feel as calm as I can be but the psychical effects are horrendous.

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26 minutes ago, boslemportvale91 said:

After multiple visits to the hospital and multiple anxiety episodes. I'm now waiting to see someone for CBT and taking diazepam. However I am having the worst panic attacks ever. Even going for a stroll is an effort, I just feel dizzy and struggle to catch my breath. 

Using Google is more damaging then helping and none of the breathing programs seem to be helping. If anyone has any podcasts , books or routines that can help me I'd appreciate it. Absolutely exhausted at this point.

Mentally I feel as calm as I can be but the psychical effects are horrendous.

Is there anyone with you when you have the panic attacks? I’m sitting here with my wife who has suffered from various mental health issues including panic disorder, and we are chatting about it. Having someone with you who can anchor you in the here and now helps. If not it can be an object or for her the dogs really help.

Recognising you are having a panic attack and that it will pass is important. For example, if being outside on your own is a fear, then being left in the middle of nowhere would make you panic. But after 10 mins it would stop. You won’t die from a panic attack. And so you’ll still be out there in your own, but not panicking. A lot of therapy is basically this but in a slower, more controlled manner. 
She found cbt really useful, and they really kicked her ass (in a good way).
Finding the root cause and dealing with that is important.

Taking up exercise can be good for mental health (I know you said going on a walk is exhausting but gently building it up maybe? Exercise releases endorphins. Swimming is a good choice. Eating a healthy diet and as has been mentioned avoiding alcohol.

Grounding techniques and distraction techniques were a big part of the techniques her therapist used with her.

We’ve gone through a lot over the last 15 years, and although we have one big hurdle to get over with her, it’s only now down the line that I can look back and realise the massive improvements she’s made and issues she had that just aren’t anymore. A big part of it has been facing fears and gradually becoming desensitised to them. So be ready to challenge yourself when your sessions starts. As you probably can tell, we’ve tried a lot, but the biggest successes have been desensitising her.  She has had issues with food, and gradually that’s a non issue now, she’s had issues with medication and now she’s able to have chemo (granted it’s <ovf censored> but she’s actually taking it). She’s currently got issues with being alone but there is a clear path to making that better (once we’ve dealt with the other crap going on currently). 
Is your appointment soon? If you feel like things are getting on top of you, call them again. 

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13 hours ago, Andyregs said:

Is there anyone with you when you have the panic attacks? I’m sitting here with my wife who has suffered from various mental health issues including panic disorder, and we are chatting about it. Having someone with you who can anchor you in the here and now helps. If not it can be an object or for her the dogs really help.

Recognising you are having a panic attack and that it will pass is important. For example, if being outside on your own is a fear, then being left in the middle of nowhere would make you panic. But after 10 mins it would stop. You won’t die from a panic attack. And so you’ll still be out there in your own, but not panicking. A lot of therapy is basically this but in a slower, more controlled manner. 
She found cbt really useful, and they really kicked her ass (in a good way).
Finding the root cause and dealing with that is important.

Taking up exercise can be good for mental health (I know you said going on a walk is exhausting but gently building it up maybe? Exercise releases endorphins. Swimming is a good choice. Eating a healthy diet and as has been mentioned avoiding alcohol.

Grounding techniques and distraction techniques were a big part of the techniques her therapist used with her.

We’ve gone through a lot over the last 15 years, and although we have one big hurdle to get over with her, it’s only now down the line that I can look back and realise the massive improvements she’s made and issues she had that just aren’t anymore. A big part of it has been facing fears and gradually becoming desensitised to them. So be ready to challenge yourself when your sessions starts. As you probably can tell, we’ve tried a lot, but the biggest successes have been desensitising her.  She has had issues with food, and gradually that’s a non issue now, she’s had issues with medication and now she’s able to have chemo (granted it’s <ovf censored> but she’s actually taking it). She’s currently got issues with being alone but there is a clear path to making that better (once we’ve dealt with the other crap going on currently). 
Is your appointment soon? If you feel like things are getting on top of you, call them again. 

Than you for the advice and help. I contacted the mental access team who said my panic attacks were a fight or flight response where my body is alert for no reason. Like you said it's a case of telling myself it is a panic attack and nothing else. Hopefully this will ease soon so I can carry on life and not be dreading leaving the house. 

Sorry to hear about the issues with your wife. She sounds like a strong lady with a strong network in yourself. I really appreciate the help and info, I fount myself looking to Google which is the worse thing to do 

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21 minutes ago, boslemportvale91 said:

Than you for the advice and help. I contacted the mental access team who said my panic attacks were a fight or flight response where my body is alert for no reason. Like you said it's a case of telling myself it is a panic attack and nothing else. Hopefully this will ease soon so I can carry on life and not be dreading leaving the house. 

Sorry to hear about the issues with your wife. She sounds like a strong lady with a strong network in yourself. I really appreciate the help and info, I fount myself looking to Google which is the worse thing to do 

If I can give one huge piece of advice that I wished we had done years ago. If you’re dreading leaving the house, don’t avoid it. It may help you to cope now but doesn’t in the long run. Keep challenging yourself. And yeah, she’s the strongest person I know. But from the reasons it started to now we’ve come a long way. And that’s why I’m adamant that mental health issues doesn’t mean someone’s weak. It can be the opposite. Going to work etc while also dealing with it all. She’s also a googler too! 
And yes, panic attacks are a natural body reaction, just at the wrong time.

keep talking 🙂 

Edited by Andyregs

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On 26/11/2020 at 12:07, boslemportvale91 said:

Than you for the advice and help. I contacted the mental access team who said my panic attacks were a fight or flight response where my body is alert for no reason. Like you said it's a case of telling myself it is a panic attack and nothing else. Hopefully this will ease soon so I can carry on life and not be dreading leaving the house. 

Sorry to hear about the issues with your wife. She sounds like a strong lady with a strong network in yourself. I really appreciate the help and info, I fount myself looking to Google which is the worse thing to do 

I’m not sure if this has ever been mentioned here, but I had no idea until just.

Men unite podcast

You might recognise one of the hosts. Can’t believe I didn’t know about this.

leon is on this weekend. Haven’t listened before, but looks relevant.

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On 27/11/2020 at 17:45, Andyregs said:

I’m not sure if this has ever been mentioned here, but I had no idea until just.

Men unite podcast

You might recognise one of the hosts. Can’t believe I didn’t know about this.

leon is on this weekend. Haven’t listened before, but looks relevant.

I've heard Monty has done a few things with Men united. I believe he was on sky news as well. Top lad is Monty 

Will give the podcast a listen. Cheers 

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